All too familiar feeling on disappointment…

That unwelcoming overbearing feeling of disappointment is creeping back inside…from someone I never thought it would stem from…

A couple of friends of mine have recently come to tell me that the reason they don’t tell me some things is due to the fact that I am too conservative or they feel I will be too judgy. I call bullshit. I am a mother and a married woman. I have also been out with them (before baby) and been stupid drunk and done some crazy things and have a ton of fun and seen sides of both of them that I have never seen before. It just seems to me that I have to pull it out of them to get them to talk to me or open up. Makes me think that I actually am intimidating to talk to (which is something I was once told when I was in high school).

Now my “best friend” and I seem to not be as close as we used to be. I know it’s probably in my own head, but I saw something she posted to someone else about being her “best friend” and it kind of bothers me. I just feel like I’m not really considered her best friend in her eyes. To be honest, there are a few people who I consider good friends or even a best friend, but I feel that I don’t get the same from them. My eyes did kind of open up around my wedding and when I had my baby. Made me see a little more clearly about where I stand.

Am I really anyone’s best friend? Or am I just a convenient acquaintance?

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