I have a tension neck ache.  I really dislike when this happens. I also dislike when I breathe shallowly. They go hand in hand. I think I need some yoga. I was taking a yoga class on Sunday mornings but I have let other things take priority over it. I am currently training for a 1/2 marathon on 4/3. It’s going fairly well. I ran 10 miles on Sunday. I was really tired Sunday night but Monday I was fine. Ran again on Tuesday. Good run. Off today. I am eating well because of WW, but I still eat emotionally. It’s always when I get home from work. I’m with the kids. I’m not focused on any one thing. I’m thinking about them, their homework, dinner that needs to be prepared and kids fed, activities, S’s constant need to have friends around, his constant need for activity, laundry, my desk that is piled up, the dirty kitchen floor. It all seems to come at me when I walk in the door of my house. And to escape the madness all I want to do is fill my mouth.  Funny how just writing this down is helping the tension I am feeling right now. I may still take 1/2 a hydrocodone. I take it occasionally as an aid in relaxation. I have no dependency on it. I just use it when I need it. I sometimes think pot would be nice. But I wasn’t a fan of it in college and I’m not sure I would be now. Plus it’s not as convenient as hydrocodone, which I get legally. I should get back to work now.

D is having a stressful week. She came down stairs this morning saying “something doesn’t feel right”. This is a sign she is stressed and she can’t figure out what is bothering her. She lost 2 homework assignments and her glasses. We talked with her about the homework. She has a plan for salvaging some credit for the missing assignments. A little later she told me it was the glasses she was upset about (H doesn’t know about them yet). She usually figures it out when I gently prompt her.  I said I would check at the Y for her. She was there on Friday night with some friends. I really hope they are there.

H is having a fairly good week. His concentration on school work is somewhat improved with his meds. His behavior between subjects is still an issue.

Love those kids beyond all measure!!! The light of my life!

Ok I’ll work now.

2 thoughts on “39”

  1. On the subject of smoking pot, I thought maybe I was the only one in the world who didn’t like the way it made me feel lol I have five little brothers, all who are avid pot smokers, successful in life, and tight with the family. I was beginning to think I was adopted since I’m none of those things. Hydrocodone does anything but help me relax. I could build a house, clean it, and sell it all in one day while taking that stuff.
    I’m beginning to think there’s nothing that helps me relax. How old is H, and what kind of meds is he taking?
    Just curious, as I have a bipolar child who recently had her meds changes.

  2. I’m the black sheep in my family – the only one who left the hometown, went to college, married late, couldn’t get pregnant, adopted children (although I always knew I would adopt regardless of the fertility issues).
    S (not H – typo there) is 9. Just stated taking a low dose of Ritalin mid-Feb. Then there was school break so we didn’t give it to him that week. As I have written, it is having some positive results, but he still can’t keep it together between subjects and during homework – he has to be reminded to get back on task multiple times. His teacher – who has been doing a great job helping him – is giving him less leeway. And I don’t disagree. He needs to develop some sense of self discipline. ADD is an interesting journey, but bi-polar – I can’t imagine. My heart goes out to you. How old is you BP child? When was the diagnosis?

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