Please Don’t Ask Me About my Food Lifestyle in the Middle of Dinner

Dear Meat Eater,

Please don’t ask me why I decided to denounce meat, while you’re gnawing on the ass of a cow. As much as I would love to ruin your dining experience, I would hate for you to blame me for making you feel guilty about your food choices mid-meal.


If you really are that fucking curious, so be it.

  1. I decided to stop eating meat because I was tired of biting into the bits of inedible parts fat. I much enjoy the ladder of eating a burger and instead just finding a slice of carrot.
  2. I was tired of the phrase, “I love animals, but I could also never give up meat.” I guess they much prefer loving animals when it is convenient for them.
  3. Seriously, just go eat your cat. Pretty sure it tastes just like cow. Oh, right. It’s socially unacceptable.
  4. I was tired of eating something that shared a beating heart like mine.
  5. Pigs are the 4th most intelligent animal on the planet. Including your dog.
  6. Yes, a pig is smarter than your dog. Seriously, why are we just not eating cats and dogs?
  7. Because beans are sure as hell tastier than animal intestines ground up, then washed with ammonia.
  8. Because animals have a soul, too.

2 thoughts on “Please Don’t Ask Me About my Food Lifestyle in the Middle of Dinner”

  1. I’m a vegetarian, but hopefully when I get a full time job(I currently have a part time one, so I’m not making enough to actually keep for myself. I give my income to my Grandma for things she needs) I plan on becoming vegan. Being a vegetarian wasn’t that hard for me, as a matter of fact, it had actually helped my budget, since I just swapped beans and bread for every meat product. However, I don’t know how I’m going to switch into veganism, simply because cheese and milk are things that are harder to switch out.

    Also, I don’t mind at all. 🙂

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