Good Morning Sunshine

Thank God for sunshine!  Especially today! It’s streaming through my window at work right now.

 I awoke sick on my stomach and weary, just bone weary.  I need time off I truly do several days or weeks but it is not possible.  I’m saving up my vacation time…for vacations I’ve planned and just because.  We’re working overtime so I am trying to get in ten hour days. 

I just wander in a fog.  Mostly it is still the sorrow. I still cry every day.  Not usually heaving sobs…just the silent kind where the tears run down your cheeks and you feel them turn from warm to cold. 

My mind knows I will be alright.  I have to be.  I have others to think of and myself too of course. But my heart just aches so much. 

I told my BFF yesterday that I am dreading Easter so much.  Just the thought of a family holiday without her.  Except for the three years I lived in South Carolina in my early 20’s…I’ve never spent an Easter without her.  Really all I want to do…is go to bed and sleep and sleep and sleep.

Ah but I cannot.  I have responsibilities!  (Thank goodness)

So for now I will move along, start typing my true crime (sigh) and be very, very thankful for that beautiful morning sun.


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