Roller Coaster

I feel like i am riding a roller coaster. My mood swings like shit. I challenge myself to not get trapped into the bad one (not even once), at least a month. But yesterday i yelled at my bf on a simple thing. Then i did not think about apologize. The ironic part was…he just hugged me. I feel bad. Yes. I am a bitch. Still wondering this guy can cope with me even when i react like an asshole. I gotta change this trait. 

Well that was my mood thingy. In life i feel the same way. Past few weeks i did feel empty. Now i feel grateful, and don’t want to think too much. Mark Manson ever shared about Fuck Yes Fuck No Law in our life. I get inspired by him. No need to care about those grey areas. I ask myself, if the answer would be Fuck Yes then I would do it. If mine is Fuck No, then forget it. Time wasting to stay in grey area.

But what if my roller coaster went down? I am not afraid anymore. I have my Dennis, he stands by me very well. And also this fucking law haha! I am not worrying about the future. Because i know it is always there. It is me that keep doubting on things. My bf supports me in every way. Also my Dad. And God. I don’t have to keep the fear inside me. 

Fuck Yes! 😉

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