All my life I have looked for a purpose. I have always felt lost to the point where I wondered why I even tried anymore. Since I was in the 9th grade I have been struggling with these feelings. Well, now I am 22 years old and engaged to a police officer here in my home town. For those of you who don’t know, you have to be a special kind of woman to be in a relationship with an officer, and by no means am I special. My life is a disaster in just about every way possible. I spent the past three and a half years in college only to get burnt out the first semester that I transferred to a University. Also, my family life has always been a hot mess. My mom is a closet alcoholic that will not even talk to me anymore and my dad, the only parent I still have, is six hours away on the gulf coast with his wife and my 18 year old little sister. Ever since my parents separated I have had to be the strong one and it has taken it’s toll on me through the years. Now I have to figure out how to be a wife soon, which is a scary wonderful journey that I can’t wait to go on, but I am so nervous. I am just scared about how life with an officer can be. In our short time together I have seen his profession in a completely different light and it is so scary. I hate seeing him leave for work. All the usual scary questions run through my mind, which he assures me is normal. It’s just in today’s society police are seen as target practice instead of the superhero’s they are.