Well, this is my first time journaling online. I hope this experience goes well!
Start of Journal:
Gah. I still cannot believe he cheated with that woman I detest. Is it so truly hard to just say “It’s over.” then go to her? He just didn’t understand either why it hurt me so. I mean, I trusted him… I don’t trust people easy, and this is just another reason to add to the list. To makes matters worse, E.’s (a sister to me) polar opposite younger sister hooked us up. Now that she doesn’t live by me anymore, she figures it’s totally fine to drop me. I wish it was possible to go back in the past and tell yourself ‘Avoid them, negative energy.’ But alas, I’ve never been good with that kind of thing… telling who will screw me over in the future. I trusted K. (polar opposite sister) to stay my friend and want the best for me. It’s kind of like Bring Me The Horizon’s song “True Friends”
Don’t you know
True friends stab you in the front?
But still… I blame myself in a way for not being more cautious. She just wasn’t a True Friend…. Eh!
Positive time! Yay! Are you happy I’m done babbling about friends being true? I am.
So today I started talking to Ki’zu again. She’s like a mom to me. I’m glad she’s doing well. Also, big sister Raven aka Ravey seems to be happy so that’s a big plus. I’m kinda glad I’m single so I concentrate on these wonderful ladies better.
On friday or saturday next week I get to go see E. E.’s baby’s gender will be announced! I’m so excited! I’m going to be an ‘aunt’…kinda. I’m not blood to her but I’m loyal so she considers me her sis just like I do her. With E. and K.’s biological family (and them obviously) it’s “blood over water” but with me, it is “loyalty over all (aka loyalty over blood. water, etc)” That basically means if your one of my “ride-or-die” friends, if my family or someone is in the wrong… I’ll pick you because your right. It doesn’t matter who they are, if your one of my few loyal friends I consider to be closer than blood then you have me as long as your not acting like a moron. I do have limits about how far I’ll go for said person. I’m not going to jail or anything for you. So anywhoooo, with her being “blood over water” and me being “loyalty over all” that leads to quite a few fights. But, it doesn’t really matter to me because I know her and she knows me. To her, in a rare case like her baby, as long as I’m loyal and behaving I’m a blood-sister.
I admire E. for that immensely.
Ta for now.