These past two weeks have been bad but they’ve been good. Let me start with the early morning of March 23rd. I knew my grandpa had been in the hospital but I didn’t really think it was that bad because nobody knew anything. No nurses told anyone if it was serious or not. My mom started her 4:30am morning shifts on March 23rd. I was fast asleep and the lights from her car pulling into the driveway and the sound of my dog squealing of excitement woke me up. I thought it might have been a little after 4:30 thinking my mom must have forgot something at home, I looked at my phone and it was 6:10am. I was a little confused as to why she was home, maybe she got sick, or maybe she forgot something, I didn’t know. She then came to my door and called my name, her voice sounded sad and sounded like she was crying, at that moment I knew something was not right. She then opened my door and said “Grandpa passed away” at that moment I started to cry telling myself this can’t be real, this has to be a dream, but it wasn’t, this was real. I immediately started to feel regret because I never got to say goodbye, I never went to go visit him in the hospital, I wish I could have one last talk with him. I never went back to sleep, I texted my boss at work and told her I couldn’t come in that day and she gave me the rest of the week off with pay, which was nice. I texted my boyfriend of almost 2 years and told him that my grandpa had passed away and he said he’s getting off work early for me which he didn’t need too but he wanted to be there for me. My dad came over with my brother and stayed with us while my mom was at my grandmas to tell her that her husband of 68 years has passed away, she asked if I wanted to come with her but I couldn’t, I wanted too but I don’t know how i’d handle it. My boyfriend came over with my favorite kind of sandwich and some mini eggs, it cheered me up a little. My dad then took me, my two brothers and my boyfriend out for lunch before we went to my grandmas house only me and my brothers went. As soon as I saw my grandma I hugged her and started to cry, then she started to cry. None of this felt real.
Last Tuesday, March 29th, we had the funeral. I had wrote my grandpa a letter to be put in the coffin with him so before the funeral and the grave site, my Aunt went and put everything that anyone wanted with him, in with him. The funeral was completely unorganized. The hurse got lost, so all of the family in the cars behind it got lost behind it. But that doesn’t matter, the people apologized and gave a 700$ refund. One of my grandpas brothers were buried there and there was an open plot right beside him so my grandpa got to be buried right next to him. My grandma thought it was so perfect and so right. Every year my grandpa would plant beans out in his garden and my mom had the idea to get little baggies with dirt from his garden and each bag have a bean seed inside of it. So after everyone’s speech at the funeral all the closest family, including me got our bags of dirt with the bean seed and poured it on top of my grandpas casket. After I poured my bag of dirt, I felt relief, I felt like that was my goodbye. After the funeral everyone went back to my grandparents property and had a get together with food and stuff. I met a lot of family members I have never met before. Later that day my aunt pulled me aside and told me that the letter I wrote my grandpa, she placed on his heart. I began to cry, I was so happy that she did this, it made me feel so good inside.
At the beginning of the obituary on the memorial website that my cousin had wrote, it started out with “My my my what a wonderful man..” My grandpa had always said “my my my”. We were over at my aunts house for dinner and she showed us these 2 beads that she had found at the bottom of her stairs that day. (My aunt and her kids all have key chains made with lettered beads of their names) but these beads looked nothing like those beads. One of the beads she had found had the letter M on it and the other had the letter Y on it. Spelling out MY. Everyone looked at each other in shock.
I honestly think this will bring my family closer, it already has, we’ve been all having dinners together and being out at my grandparents property enjoying this nice sunny and warm spring and keeping my grandma company. You can really tell that my grandma is depressed and so sad and it makes me so sad but she has a lot of people to keep her happy.
My grandpa may be gone but not forgotten.
Love you forever grandpa. I’ll see you again someday.