To commit or to give in to temptations

I was famous in my circle for not looking anything like VS models yet having men here and there. Those girls \ were probably thinking how I manage my men. They’re like my clothes; always there, never worn enough yet thrown after sometime. The person I am with right now, is like my favourite bra. Although its worn out, I’d still wear it. I’ll still keep it until I get a new one of the same design. While writing this, Im just thinking on how to put out the fact that I am straying away from him, for some mere entertainment. But Im stopping myself. 

I have this want to just go out, meet new people, exchange a passionate kinda kiss, get in bed, wake up the next morning like nothing happened and move on. No, not like a bitch but more like a woman who wants no commitment. Yet being a person who isn’t as sexy as the VS models, who would just want to sleep with me? I mean, I am good in bed but would any man who interact with me for less than hour be willing to stay the night with me? Would I feel empty the next night even if he did stay tonight? Then how many more nights and men would it take to finally tell myself that I’m ready to commit? 

All that being jot down, I have never cheated on him because he don’t deserve that kind of treatment. He deserves to be loved and I have got so much love to give. Time and again, he confesses his thoughts on marrying me. He constantly reminds me how much he loves me, and that I’m the best thing that ever happened to him. He is the kind of man I’d risk my life for giving birth to his children. Nobody’s perfect though, seeing so much failures  in relationships, I am just, afraid of commitment. 

 

One thought on “To commit or to give in to temptations”

  1. I think most people are afraid of commitments these days. Give it a bit more time and all your love and see if maybe then you are ready. Pray for guidance, too.

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