As a child the imagination runs wild. One day your swimming with the mermaids the next day the floor is lava and your jumping around your bedroom with pillows scattered around the floor.
When I was growing up my crazy imagination did not stop it just grew and I always had big big dreams.
When I was 16 my English teacher wrote something important in my leaving book and it stuck with me since :
” You have the sort of creative and at times crazy mind that many people would kill for, don’t let anyone take that away! You might be away with the fairies some days, but it’s that very thinking which has given you so many brilliant ideas”.
After I finished school I continued dreaming big. I wanted to be a graphic designer and have my own little business that I could be proud of. And you know for some time I worked hard for that dream. I finished both college and uni with the highest grades. Last year I proudly graduated with a first in graphic communication. I even during that time worked as a graphic designer at a local print shop.
Things we’re going well for me until I graduated and adult life hit my like a double decker bus. I’ll be honest I have found it very difficult. I have to have things go a certain way. I plan out everything and when it doesn’t work out the way I planned I just can’t handle it.
I realllllly can’t handle it. Even the small things bother me, for example if I have planned to do something as silly as cleaning the house and something gets in the way of that, I can’t handle it. So you can just imagine what I was like when adult life has not gone my way.
I had to quit my part time graphic design job to work for an outsource company dealing with complaints. Although I can do the job and have even been doing so well I have been given some larger responsibility and role a within the workplace. I am not happy. It’s not what I planned to do.
For some time, almost a year. I just went from day to day. Get up, go to work, eat, sleep. Everyday following the same patten, unhappy and just trying to make enough money to survive ( currently supporting myself and my other half on a basic salary ).
Last week I just had enough. I started drawing sketches of design work and listing ideas. Things have started looking up and I feel myself again. Now I’m just saviny money for a computer to help me start up a side business doing something I enjoy. And honestly it’s not about money for me. Being creative, being myself makes me happy and I’m starting a better outlook on things.
So the message of the story is don’t give up on yourself or your dreams. Life is for living and find a way to do something you love. For me this is just a small step and I’m still hoping to get a creative job but for now I’m going to make the best of what I can do.
Now kinda of topic and a bit of a did you know… when I was very young all I wanted to be was a doctor as my dad has difficulty walking and for some time I was obsessed with sciency things. It’s just crazy to think I wanted to be a doctor then I went to art college haha. Things can always change.
For the few people who may read this, what did you want to be when you grew up and now what do you do/ want to do?
Happiness of the Day
My little cat came for cuddles this morning, purring as she hid under the blanket from the cold.