How can one want something that they never really had?
I have never had the ability to describe someone on paper. It always sound so good in my head. The feeling and passion has never translated through my fingertips. The uncanny thing is, it wants to burst out of me right now.
So this is for you Alexios. You inspire me.
When I saw you I couldn’t believe that God crafted and painted someone so perfectly. The brush strokes were done with care and attention. He sculpted you with pure love. Your hair is unruly and my hands itched to ruffle it. Your eyes are full of life and intelligence. Your cheek bones and nose show your heritage – high, proper, cultured and perfect. Your smile curves on your face like an invitation, a hint of the hidden, the mischievious. Your lips are cherry red and hint at sexuality that few possess. Your chin is firm and masculine. His hands moulded your neck – so graceful and it curves onto a pair of shoulders that hint at strength and responsibility. The breadth of your chest is a place where I would love to lay my weary head at the end of every day. Your arms promise to provide protection and your hands are big and open – like your heart. Your hips are curvy and solid and promise vitality. They lead to your muscled legs that carry you with your abundant zest for life. But God didn’t stop there. He gave you life. Vibrancy. Energy. You shine through every laugh, every word. History has bred a Man. A Man with manners, gentleness, compassion, passion, confidence, excitement, belief, ambition, gratitude. He gifted you with a sense of humour. An infectious laugh. Your voice and accent touch my soul. When you call me Madamoiselle I melt. He gave you the sight to see beyond the surface. He made you deep and real. He made you with layers that I would be blessed to peel back and know. He made you wanting to give love and to expect it in return. I know we briefly had a moment in time but I felt all this in you. I saw beyond the outside. You spoke to a part of me that I actually allowed to open. You motivate me to do more. Your energy carries across time and space. I believe we had a connection. You inspired the loving romantic in me. I want to write poetry about you. I want to sculpt you. I want to show you all the love you so richly deserve. I know now how people fall in love so fast. But, I had unfair expectations. I am not who you are looking for and that’s ok. I promise I will never forget you. And maybe one day, we will meet again. I hope God carries on shining His light on you.
These words resonate with me: “Sometimes it hits like a car crash” – and it did. But now I know what I want. You have filled me with a passion and desire to keep asking for more. Maybe, “Everybody hurts just a little too much. Everybody hurts but it’s never enough. It’s wonderful to fall. Let’s love and risk it all. But, I’d rather love just a little too much.”
Goodbye my Greek God. You have definitely earned your title.