You’re my 3am thought.

Dear Suplado,

It’s exactly 3:22 in the morning now and I’m still up. I just finished reading the conversation we had in Facebook, the conversation when I used to call you my “Chiboy”. Honestly, it wasn’t the first time I read it again, I read it from time to time, I read it if I want to reminisce those moments when we’re still okay, I read it especially when I miss you. (And yes, at this point in time I missed you. After all what happened I still do miss you.) Well I didn’t exactly finished everything because the conversation we had there is pretty long. I just filtered which part will I read. I read the conversation we had last Feb 17, 18 and 19 of 2015. It was a mixed emotions while I was reading it. It made me smile, got my eyes a bit teary and it made me questioned everything. There’s this part in our convo when you asked me “Paano kung tumigil nako?” How dumb I was not realizing you were giving me hint even before, that you really want and willing to give up what we have. Was that the reason why whenever we were having a heated argument you’re always the one who brings up the topic about “pahinga” and “titigil na” thing, which by the way your break up term to me. 

You see, until now I am still confused how and why things end up this way. 

Why you made me fall for you when you know you’re still not over her?

Bakit hinayaan mong magtagal ng ganito kung alam mo sa sarili mo na mahal mo pa rin sya?



– J

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