I don’t think he knows how much I am dying on the inside. I haven’t spoken to him in almost 10 days. I miss him like crazy. I have a hard time sleeping, I can’t focus, and I have no appetite. I want nothing more than to hear the phone ring and hear him on the other end saying “hey baby girl” but something tells me that isn’t going to happen. Something tells me that he’s gone for good and he took my heart right along with him when he said goodbye that Sunday. I just don’t understand, though. How can we go from something so good to something so bad in such a short amount of time? I don’t know how we got here. I just want to go back and fix it. I want to be us again. He’s my everything and I don’t think he truly realizes that. I just wish I knew what to do. I know he most likely won’t read this but I have to write this anyways.
I want you to know how I truly feel. I miss you, simply put my heart hurts and I feel like a part of me is missing. I hate not talking to you. I know you stay busy and can’t talk all the time and that’s not what I want from you. Just an “I’m OK” would put my mind at ease. I’m sorry I’ve called you and messaged you so much I’ve just been worried about you. But I’m scared Aaron, I’m scared of how much I love you, for the simple fact I haven’t loved someone as much as I truly love you before. I’m also scared because I don’t want to lose you and I’m worried if I let you get to close I will. You melted my cold heart and made me realize what love truly was and I want that with you. I want forever with you like we talked about. These past few weekends I’ve spent with you are how I want it to always be. Please know that I would do anything to see you happy because of the simple fact I care and I love you. You mean more to me than you’ll ever know. Please know that I’ll always be here for you all you have to do is call or message me. I love you, Aaron Everett, forever and always.
All my heart,