Drunken revelations

so I went out for drinks with my two closest friends today (no not alcoholic drinks before you suggest anything). We were sat there at the table making plans for ¬†night out late on in the week when one of my friends turns to me and asks me not to get too drunk this weekend. Now I wasn’t really planning on drinking this much anyway and curious to find out why she had said that I asked her what I was like when I get drunk. She told me that when I’m drunk I’m funny and dance everywhere but that’s not the problem, it’s when I go slightly further than drunk that I become a problem. I was aware of the fact that I had drunk too much the last few times we were out and I had suffered from a shameful and guilty hangover the next day but I had kind of expected that my friends brushed it off, I mean I have seen them in some terrible states and I just laugh it off and tell them it happens even to the best of us. So she told me what I do when I’m in that territory slightly past drunk and I realised that those feelings of shame and guilt I have with my hangover aren’t normal, they’re actual residual feelings from my behaviour the night before. Basically I become irritable, impatient, I wander off a lot and have a very short fuse. I’m not violent or vicious don’t worry about that, but I just become someone that I would be embarrassed to be were I sober. I don’t know whether this suggests I need to stop drinking all together or just do some serious work on controlling how much I drink on a night out but either way it’s something that needs to be worked on. I can honestly say that I’m a little bit embarrassed about the way I’ve been behaving and I think it’s in part due to the fact that I suppress so many emotions when I’m sober that they just overflow all at once when I’m drunk leading to disaster but either way I’m not proud of it, and it will be something I’m going to start working on in the future.

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