Screaming. Because I’m pretty young compared to everyone else…

“You must be this tall to ride this ride” at an amusement park has never been an issue for me considering I’m above average height.

But “you must be this tall to… ride… this ride” in the social world is a little bit of an issue. I’m 20 so I’m not physically a child. But in an emotional and mental sense, I am indeed a 12 year old. Maybe 15.

My looks are little misleading. I look older, I always have. The pure fear on creepy, older men’s faces when I told them I was 16 or 17, was golden. But the disheartening moment when a cute, nice, older guy is totally interested in you and you basically have to tell him “I’m not even old enough to buy cigarettes.”, is crushing.

Half of the people I talk to are 21 and up. I turn 21 in August, but now this little bit of waiting time is killing me. I know thing aren’t magically going to get better but it’d be cool to go to the bar with any of them. I’m not a day person. I like nightlife. I like to drink (Oh no, an under age drinker! How ironic I’m about say… Grow up.). It’d be nice to go somewhere that’s open past 10:00 PM in this tiny town. And it’s not just about drinking. There are concerts, after parties and events that are JUST for 21 and older. Like come on… I can be a cool kid(+2 ironic) too.

This town is boring during the day, but the night scene isn’t so bad. My brother, who is 10 years older then me, has been practically dying for me turn 21 since I was like, 17. We’re extremely close. He works a lot and late into the day. So bars always sound  like a good time to him. He doesn’t mind going out to places with me or staying at home, but when he’s feeling restless he wants to go out to a bar.

What’s so god damn special about these places?

We’ll see how I feel about this in two months.

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