My first entry here. Just wanted to express my angst over this job thing. I’m feeling really negative about it now, and it NEEDS to happen. I really thought they would call me, instead of my having to follow up with them. Tomorrow is follow up day, and I am dreading it because I’m afraid of the impending disappointment. I don’t know what I’ll do if I don’t get this job. I have reached the absolute end of the line financially and have completely lost motivation to look for other things. I’m stressed, depressed, and afraid. I’ve done nothing but sleep and eat today. I’ve got zero motivation. Please, Universe, send me some positive vibes here, and also send them on to the company team. Look at me, basically praying for success… It’s moot now – out of my hands. The suspense is KILLING me, and failure would kill me even more. I’ll have to go to the DZ this weekend, and next, and next, and next. And more job searching. SO FUCKING DEMORALIZING. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LET ME HAVE THIS JOB!!!!! I’m fucking desperate. This has been the hardest and worst year of my life, just trying to hang on. I just need a break. Please. Just this one. 

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  1. Welcome to this journaling site! It’s a good place. Sweetie, don’t pray to the Universe; pray to God who made the universe. He is real, and he is your friend. He is for you, not against you. I will pray too that you get this job or something else better comes along for you. Believe! God bless you. Don’t give up. You have a great future. Learn to walk with God and watch your life change. Talk to Jesus. He is ALWAYS listening. The Bible says “Cast all your cares on Him, for He cares for you.”
    I hope I am not offending you, but you sounded like you really needed some hope and someone to care. I care.

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