Control Issues

I have such a hard time with the concept of “control”. I use to think if I tried to manipulate everything in my life to suit me that I’d be a happier person. All my thoughts and feelings were wrapped up in the outcome.  It was completely oblivious to me that in this mind set I was creating even more stress. In other words my so-called need to have control was weighing me down. 

I’d get into a fight with the man. Oh man, did we fight! Post battle was equally draining and epic. I’d fixate on every word spoken, replay the whole scene inside my brain, and seriously soak myself in a bath full of misery. I was waiting… and waiting for some lightening bolt moment where The Man would do or say something that was so profound that my wounded heart would instantly be healed. Turns out he doesn’t know any magic words. I do.

Once I had accepted that The Man isn’t responsible for my well being, my happiness, my stability, and I stopped depending on him a lot of stress and insecurity melted away. We are all free people. Relationships strengthen an individual. We need to look after and love ourselves. It’s time to take on the responsibility of caring for ourselves. After all if you expect others to fully look after you than why not hold yourself to that very same standard. Live with love for all things.

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