I just recently posted my first diary entry but I’m back already. This is a good sign, maybe it means I’ll be consistent with logging my thoughts down, or maybe I’m getting ahead of myself.
I heard that when you’re annoyed or when you’re upset it’s best to write down your feelings. I understand the logic in that, however it’s easier said than done. How am I supposed to remind myself to jot down my feelings when I’m in the middle of a heated debate right? Well this is my attempt at leveling up in that area. I believe patience comes with training. Isn’t that why we have monks? Don’t they have to dedicate their whole lives to really obtain inner peace?
I initially began the urge to write down how I feel again because I have insomnia and I don’t have valiums anymore. Also because my boyfriend pays attention to so many other things but neglects the growth of our relationship (and trust me I don’t ask much from him) and I’m feeling lonely, frustrated and upset. My boyfriend is also very stubborn and as much as he knows himself I am giving good advice, and I’m right he wants to prove his way is right or on par as to my suggestion. He’s blinded by his Pride and ego plus he’s so stubborn he can’t communicate how he truly thinks/feels. It’s so frustrating on my end, however I must remind myself no one thinks exactly the way I do. I must remind myself that I have been through a lot which in turn I learned how to adapt faster than some. I must remind myself that most people need to learn by making mistakes. I must remind myself that I have done the same thing, but to my guardians and parents. I have to give him the benefit of the doubt as well, he’s a good guy, sometimes I just forget because my mind is clouded with frustration and that is a weakness I have to change. I am feeling much better now and I am glad I decided to jog down this thought.