It’s been a month since I’ve written anything down, I’ve been going through some stuff. I was lied to over and over and put in a really bad situation. I needed time to figure things out and decide my path. It took time but I now know the direction my life is going.
Ive had the time I needed to heal, although I am still dealing with some issues I’m in a much better place. I know during this time I hurt my Master, it wasn’t my intentions. I will do whatever it takes to make it up to him and regain his trust, respect, and desire. I’m glad he is understanding and willing to give our relationship another try, I truly do need him in my life.
I will be punished for not obeying him and doing what I was told to do for the past month. I will graciously accept my punishment, knowing I deserve it and knowing it will make Master happy. It’s not a horrible punishment, more I think to drive me crazy and to teach me a lesson. It will definitely be a challenge for me to do, more so because I will want to give into the pleasure and know that I cannot.
It will be nice to get back to normal again, to have Master back in my life, teaching and guiding me. More than ever before I desperately need the ability to give up control completely, to have Master be in charge. I need the burden of control out of my hands, to be set free. I know Master will take good care of me, I have no worries, I am in very good hands.