“You know, you can never prevent yourself from being ‘too’ attached to someone.
At the beginning, you will notice everything. Every single detail. The way he talks with his humor and wit. The way he makes you smile with his weird ways. When he asks you if you’re home or to stay safe. When he randomly sends selfies. When he messages you at the wee hours of the morning, just to ask if you’re awake. Just to have someone to talk to. When he asks for your opinion on things. When he listens to your requests. You can’t help but feel special. You’ll feel valued at some point of your exchange.
That’s why attachment is a risk, you’re putting your heart at risk with something uncertain. With something unclear. But.. But it should always be a risk you’re willing to take— if you really like or love this person and when you know he’s worth it.
Actually, being attached is a happy feeling. Like, you really don’t regret anything. Even if it’s unrequited. Even if he doesn’t feel the same extent of emotion towards you. You will still feel happy and contented.
But of course, despite of how contented you are, you can’t not have fears— The fear of rejection, and of being lonely. The fear of too many expectations, the fear of disappointments. These are just some of the fears you should face, in order to understand the essence of liking, of loving, and of being loved back. Without these fears, you will not experience the joy of loving.
It’s like a part of growing up— you will not get everything you want, and it’s okay. It’s being mature enough to understand that not everyone will like you back and it’s not his fault and it’s not your fault too, it’s just the way life is. Life always happens.
So, no matter how mentally destroying being attached to someone is, you cannot ignore the fact that it is also a liberating feeling. You just have to accept reality and go with the flow. Just like how the “it’s great while it lasted” and “It’s better to love than not love at all” saying goes.”
—Ruth Gabrielle Miranda
Photo by Elena Helfrecht