I’m so tired of loving him.
I miss him so much.
Why the hell did I have to fall in love with my bully?
The last time I saw him was at graduation. The last time I talked to him was last semester, in January. It hurts so much to love him. I bet he’s lost his virginity at this point, and that he’s forgotten me… I can’t forget him. I have dreams, daily, about him. He’s on my mind all the time and I probably will never see him again for all I know.
And the thing is: he’s such a douche. But I fell for that. He always stared at me, he would always mess with me, and touch me when he could, he’d hit on me, and talk to and about me a lot, and he would over hear conversations I was in from feet away… I thought there was something.. But I was wrong.
I can still feel his touch, his presence. It’s overwhelming. And I can still hear him. And smell him. And see him.
In my dreams everything happens. From sex to happily ever after, to fights, to conversations, to how. I just wish it could be true…
i miss you, so much, boy. It’s crazy and I love you.