I haven’t written anything on here for 10 days so I should probably check in with some updates.
I got an e-mail today that was sent yesterday but I just read it today. It was an e-mail from Bed Bath and Beyond about a part time job that I applied for. It said they reviewed my resume and wanted me to go in and fill out an application then they’ll schedule an interview for me. So I went in today and did that but when I talked to the manager he didn’t seem to have any idea what I was talking about. He didn’t seem to know anything about the e-mail or a position open. He said he just hired someone else for the position but if another one opens up he’ll call me. So, of course, I’m really mad because a) this is the closest I’ve gotten to a part time job out of the 16 places I applied to and b) I got my hopes up again just to have them crushed…again. I should just remember to stop being optimistic because every time I think something good is going to happen it never works out and I’m more disappointed then I would have been if I just didn’t have high expectations.
For example, I just got my AP test scores and I got a 2 on my physics test. I wasn’t expecting anything great and I didn’t get a good score but I’m not upset about it because I wasn’t expecting anything in the first place. On the other hand, I got a 5 on my APUSH test, which I also wasn’t expecting. I can be happy for that obviously and it’s even better because I didn’t have any expectations for it.
Anyway not I have to keep going with the job hunt. I ran out of money.
I’m rewatching a lot of Pentatonix stuff because I’m really sad that I’m not seeing them in concert this year. See? That’s another thing I got my hopes up for just to have all of my dreams crushed. Anyway, I feel like I should reflect on all of the best days of my life up until now because I keep thinking about how I was so close to having my dreams come true but it failed. Thinking about the good things that have already happened is probably healthier than crying (literally) over what almost happened. [Count your blessing everyday, it makes the monsters go away]
- Going to the Foam n Glow rave and getting away with it. Still can’t believe I pulled that off.
- The whole family vacation to Maine last summer, specifically playing Dutch Blitz, climbing on the rocks, and going to the boardwalk.
- Junior Semi because it made me realize dances are kinda cool
- Junior Prom because my dress made me really confident in myself and my fake eyelashes actually stayed put
- Going to Adam’s Eden with those people from California
- The day I got my license
- Seeing the Maze Runner in theaters
- Getting a 5 on my APUSH test
- Going ice skating with Whitney, Mary, and McKenzie
- Going to football games and hockey games
I’m just holding on to the fact that life isn’t about the lows and I should focus on the highs. I should be careful, that almost sounds too optimistic for me.