The past few days have been much better for me. The voices have been much fainter. Sometimes hours pass where I don’t hear anything at all. It’s at these times that I wonder if it’s all over or if it was all just a trick of my mind the whole time. I know what I went through and experienced this past year and a half. I know I experienced things that I just couldn’t wrap my head around and come up with a reasonable explanation for. Last year, I captured these voices on tape, I’ve had objects moved in my home before my eyes, I’ve experienced frequent physical attacks, such as pokes, jabs, strange vibrations that move around my body and more. I’ve literally had these voices appear on voice mail messages and have even received phone calls from them. I remember it all in great detail. I remember how intense it was when it all started. I remember how some of these menacing voices were so powerful that they seemed to emit shock waves that literally seemed to make the very ground beneath my feet shake. There is much about this experience that I know I’ll never forget, even though I’d like to very much. Yet, somedays it’s like this oppression situation isn’t even there at all and that’s a wonderful thing. It gives me a chance to remember what it was like before it all happened and yes, at times like that, I even reflect and think to myself “nah, that couldn’t have really happened to could it have?”.
For the most part now, the voices are much fainter than they were last year. No longer do I hear them at all times of the day, distracting me, making doing even the most simple task extremely challenging. Last year, I remember I could barely handle a phone call with a customer at my work. These menacing voices would either come in over the sound of static during the phone call, or they would get right up in my ear and scream “This is really happening!”, again, when they did this, it was often as if their voices could make the very ground shake they were that intense.
I’m just so thankful things aren’t as bad as they were this time last year. Every day is an effort to get back to my old reality and leave this strange bizarro reality that I found myself in behind me. Each day I make more and more progress in doing this but once and awhile, like this morning for example, these malevolent entities give me a reminder just to let me know that they are still there.
This morning, I was awoken from sleep at about 5:30. Usually I relish these first few moments after I wake up, it’s usually when the voices seem to have disappeared completely, though it usually only last for a brief time. However, this morning, I woke up to the feeling that I was vibrating slightly, then the all too familiar voices came on talking trash like they always do. These bizarre vibration sensations are nothing out of the ordinary for me, but this morning I also felt like I was being engulfed in some sort of strange energy. It was like some presence was trying to literally move into the space that I was occupying and I could feel this tingling electric sensation….it was freaky and unpleasant to say the least.
But I shrugged it off, made some coffee, browsed the internet a bit, then went to work. I’ve got a job and a life to live. These malevolent entities just seem content following me around yapping all day. I’m so desensitized to their bag of tricks now. Every once and awhile, I’ll see an orb or a patch of dark mist dart out in front of me, but I don’t respond to it. Their tricks for the most part don’t even phase me anymore simply because I’ve been living with it practically every day for the past year and a half. However, every so often, they try something new, like this morning when they tried to move into my physical space or body or whatever the heck it was that they were doing . But, if they were looking to freak me out like they once did last year, they failed miserably.