I am a friendless loser.

I finally figured out today that I don’t really have any friends.

I am a freshman alone in college, five hours away from my home of eight years. I’ve finished my first week here, but so far I haven’t been able to socialize with anyone. People are out partying (at parties I wasn’t invited to) or are in the forest doing drugs and drinking (which I don’t want to do). I don’t know if it’s just cause of a different of interests, or I just haven’t gotten the chance to meet people, but I’m lonely as hell.

Supposedly I have many friends. Skype, RPR… They add me as friends, they talk to me. I help them out, giving them advice, asking about their health, encouraging them to extend their abilities and beyond.

I’ve been rather sad and depressed. I’ve been acting differently, not being in group chats as often. When I am in the groups, I am quiet or short. I use ellipses. Apparently all of this isn’t enough to for people to actually sit up and take notice however. Not one person has commented on it. No one has said, Hey Bell, you doing alright?

I don’t know if people just don’t notice…or just don’t care. I thought these people were supposed to be my friends, but now I’m just not sure.

I’m going to bed. Maybe I’ll feel better tomorrow.

2 thoughts on “I am a friendless loser.”

  1. Aww I also experienced that when i was in highschool. But when i started my day in college, i met a lot of good people who became my friends. Don’t worry you’ll find your own friend too. Maybe he or she don’t have a courage to talk to you but who knows? Goodluck and Godbless you always

  2. I experienced this as well when I moved away for college. I was 5 PROVINCES, not 5 hours away so you can only imagine how lonely I was. I lived in residence and I remember being able to hear people socializing and having parties through the vents.

    This only lasted for about 2 weeks. Then I just got tired of being lonely and made some friends. Sure, most of those relationships were superficial, but you can’t walk into college and expect to meet your BFF. It doesn’t work like that.

    I remember getting myself all dolled up and walking around the residence. I’d pretend I was getting something from my car, did a quick stop at the grocery store, whatever. But I made sure I was SEEN. Only took about 3 days before I was at a party.

    Also, if you don’t drink or do drugs you need to accept that your social circle will be smaller. Not EVERYONE in college drinks and does drugs, but it’s definitely more common.

    It’ll get better! Keep us updated, :).

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