Self Empathy

I’m preventing myself from being a pain in the ass to him, even just for a day. I’m tired of doing my best laugh, best joke, best version of myself that he liked about me. Can I have a moment of silence please? Where I can celebrate my misery from this stupid unrequited love?? I’m tired of feeling so worthless when it comes to him. I’m sick of getting my heart beaten up perpetually from hoping too much and always ended up getting the opposite of what I want. I need to get over him. I need to stop expecting. I need to have a fresh air and be in a different place. I want to get out from this constant loophole. I’m getting weary from all the bullshits I have to face everyday. I just want…to be alone for awhile. A one-day break away from him along with my untolerable feelings. A pause from getting my heart broken with the idea of him…with the idea of us. I deserve to be happy even for once.
Come on. Have a self-respect. Stop hurting yourself emotionally. Listen to mood-booster songs and cut the mopey act. Stop reading thoughtcatalog and watching rom coms, they are the source of false hopes. Life is cruel in the real world, so wake up. You are not inside a fictional book, you’re just a plain girl living in this world. But you are worthwhile. You know yourself too much that you hate the other sides of it, but that’s okay. The important thing is, you know who you are. You know that you deserve to have someone better and you’re still hoping. In fact, you are strong. Because weaklings stopped hoping a long time ago but look where you are now. You’re still exploring every bit of yourself, loving and hating. And that’s beautiful. You are beautiful without your approval and someday a guy will tell you that everyday. You just have to wait for it honey. I’m sure it will come.

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