When you have been in a loveless relationship/marriage for so long – …anger rises in your veins quicker…it is getting harder and harder to stay. My emotions have overcome me and now it just seems like it is normal to feel this way, to be this way. My heart tells me leave, but my brain tells me to stay! Damn you brain!!! Stop thinking logically… sensible! I don’t care if I am alone any more. I rather be alone than with someone and be this miserable. I have no one else to worry about now but me for the first time in a long time, why can’t I stop thinking logically and sensibly? Take the risk damn it… take the chance! Yes you might fail, yes you might suffer, but aren’t you suffering now… just in a different way? Failure, I laugh at failure! HA! So what in the hell is keeping me here? That is a questions I ask myself every day when I wake up and every night before I go to sleep. WHY AM I STILL HERE!?