Love, its a word that holds so much power. And i can’t bring myself to say it much less feel it.

And tonight he tried to make me say it back. He told me the way he feels about me, it was so beautiful but it went in one ear and out the other..if I’m completely honest i don’t feel it at all. If i analyse myself i know the answer. I haven’t let myself fall for him, sure i really like him but love is another story completely. I think I’m sabotaging myself, subconsciously my defence system has come to life and it doesn’t want me to get hurt again. 
Im more guarded man the President of the United states, and with a long distance relationship it just duplicates the amount of guards. 

For some reason though i feel like my heart is telling me this isn’t right, the relationship is off in some way, I’m hoping I’m wrong but I’m a usually always right but for once i would love to prove myself wrong, either way for now i can’t reciprocate what he’s feeling.

Goodnight Journal.

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