attack of the in-laws

My soon to be father in-law is in town. Due to Anton working overseas i get the privilege of  having various sleepovers with his parents for 10 days at a time. i use the term privilege very, very  lightly. One an economics professor the other an english teacher, which means they are FULL of knowledge and information that they LOVE to share! They say all advise is good advice but when it comes to relationships i wish the 3 times divorced duo would  keep their opinions to themselves. His father saw my ring for the first time today & said wow looks expensive, do you know what your getting into? far from the Congrats! so happy for you that i was expecting. What i wanted to say was if by what im getting into you mean my first of many failed marriages where convenience and not love play a factor in us tying than knot then no i dont but if you mean a 60 year marriage like that of my grandparents where they couldn’t have a penny to their name but were rich at heart than yes thats exactly what i expect, unconditional love. despite his insensitive comments i knew he was fond of me i said all the right things, entertained his talks of politics, religion all the faux pas, but i was tired. tired of proving myself, after all Anton hadn’t had to do much of anything to impress my parents. he had it easy we lived abroad 8 months out of the year.  I uprooted my life to live in his hometown. he watched the ball game with my dad for 3 hours one day out of the year. that was the extent of his effort. my parents were easy going, unbiased. it felt unfair and at this point i was resentful, sick of dealing with the itineraries they laid out for me when he left for work, sick of the ass kissing and their nit picking, the suggestions and the prying. it all felt invasive. i was under a microscope. I needed air, space, i needed comfort and familiarity. I wanted to be Kaila Giordino not Kaila Camden. i felt i diluted myself when they were around i became less multi cultured my accent faded, my clothes not as vibrant. I missed myself and yet after all this time i couldn’t stop playing the part for them, or was it out of my love for that I Anton I did it? either way the show must go on.

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