Self Diagnosed

So, I have been thinking over my mental state and thoughts and i decided to go online and search my “symptoms” or “signs” of whatever i have. I took a few assessment tests and found out what is wrong with me. I match every single sign for these two disorders. Bipolar Disorder and Borderline personality Disorder. I feel somewhat relieved knowing what I have. I just need a doctor to confirm so i can be medicated. Im kind of upset considering there is so much wrong with me. Ive already been diagnosed with Suicidal Ideation, Anxiety, Major Depressive Disorder, and PTSD. I have a long wrap sheet and i didn’t really want to make it any longer. But since I’m not medicated for any of the prior disorders, I think is should be assessed and medicated for the new ones. Im positive I have those two new disorders which is upsetting. But I’m kind of happy knowing what kind of crazy I am.

2 thoughts on “Self Diagnosed”

  1. Bless your dear heart. Those are two conditions that make life difficult, don’t they. All your conditions should be under proper medication. I don’t know your age, but you may qualify for disability, too, if you are younger than 65. I’m not sure about the numbers (55?) —but you could talk to a disability lawyer. What they need is paperwork from doctors and hospitals. Something tangible.
    Anyway, more importantly, please don’t say you are crazy or think it. These are conditions that are becoming more and more evident in the population. You’ve been hurt, most likely (PTSD) and your heart is broken and feels helpless. Probably early childhood hurt. That goes deepest to form personality. I am talking but I don’t hear myself saying anything helpful. I’m sorry. Let me say this: whatever is “wrong” with you, I know from your journal entries that you are a beautiful and caring person. And most of all, remember God loves you, you are His special child. He understands everything that makes you so fragile, and He is watching over you with great love. A
    verse comes to my mind from the Bible: “He who touches you touches the apple of God’s eye.” Evidently He wants to let you know in His own words how precious you are to Him. Love to you, dear one.

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