Journal Day 23

Well I woke up today full of energy and zest even though I only had around 6 hours of sleep last night. After taking maybe ~3 hours or so making those journal entry posts on different websites last night, I had an idea to make a program that would post it in all five websites.

Just write it once, and it posts it in all the sites. Finally my life had a purpose again. It was a fun project to start, I wrote a couple of classes and a bunch of empty methods, I also imported some previous functions I’d written in the past. So far so good, everything’s working fine.

Berry breakfast

I ate breakfast, took a shower, and while doing these things I was always thinking about the code. How to do it? How… What ways would work? And I think I came up with an answer, it’s pretty obvious now that I know it, but you know. This is going to be a fun project to work on.

Sadly though I had to go to work. The project had to wait. I drove in to work, a drive that felt like took hours and drained me of all my vitality I had on the project. I got in and went intno a one hour meeting right away to discuss more work. I’m out of that meeting now and I just ate some more breakfast. Some nuts and a nut bar.


Second breakfast

Now I actually have to do work. The project can wait. Oh yeah, I named the project “LG2MT”, kind of a play on the word “LGBT”, but it’s also short for: “LiveJournal, GoodNightJournal, Medium, MegawattApps, and Tumblr Poster.”

I signed into skype and I got a friend request from Observant Bystander. She’s the person I wrote about in Day 20 of my journal, the other person who kept a daily log of their days and who I made fun of for being on Day 365 even though she only started like 8 months ago. I’m just surprised that she’s 16?! Now I feel like an old guy creeping in on young girls, when just a few years ago I was talking to loads of 16 year old girls, but it was fine because I was aroudn their age too.

I’m also really motivated now though to step my game up. If a 16 year young person can do the same exact things I can do, and there’s not much of a skill gap, then my life is kind of meaningless right? Not saying she shouldn’t keep it up, by all means excel. I’m just disappointed for myself that I consider myself really far behind. If you just kept it up Observant Bystander, by the time you got to my age, your skills would completely outshine mine (at my present state).

I don’t know if that’s even true though. I’ve accomplished a lot in my teen years. At 19 or 20 I’d published like 20 iOS and Android apps, and one Windows app. At 19 I had a website that got over 30,000 visitors per day consistently, and it was one of the top sites on Alexa. At 13 I was an admin of a World of Warcraft private server. At 14 I got over 500,000 views on YouTube on an original video by me. At 14-15 I created my first domain website, by 16 it was receiving more than 10,000 visitors per day.

Not that any of that even matters now. Those websites are gone. The videos are still up, but they’re historic and no one watches them anymore, even though I have more than 1.3 million views 8 years later. Most of my apps have been unpublished, all that hard work GONE. Those websites are down, someone else bought the domain names and I was unable to renew. I spent years on those sites creating designs and creating content. A movie was made on a story I had written, I was given no credit. But I didn’t care, I had web traffic, I got attention. All vanished.

So, I don’t know if she will be able to surpass me in those terms. I don’t even think she wants to. She’ll excel in her own specialties that I will never be a match in.

And we just talked briefly on Skype for a few minutes. She told me everyone in her generation was basically like her and was amazing with computers and technology. Does that make me scared, hopeful?

I’m back around an hour later, I’m not going to pick up where that last thought ended. Something else happened and I wrote about it in my private post. All my flare has gone. I feel a mix of emotions; serenity, contentment, uncertainty, despair, hope, happiness, depression. Basically, I feel alive. Moments like these mae me feel grateful and happy to have experienced life, but at the same time resentful that I don’t quite have everything I want.

This is another hour later since that last post. Yeah. Funny how one teeny tiny incident can derail my entire train of thought. I’m grateful for that moment that occurred, because I was able to write about it (in a private entry) and in that one brief instance experienced all of what life had to offer, what else could I ask for?

This is another hour after that previous post. I’ve been very productive with work and have gotten a lot done. Sigh. I feel really desperate to work on LG2MT again, but I can’t. I’m at work, and I have to do work related things. I mean of course there’s nothing physically stopping me from working on LG2MT, but I recall from the tv show Silicon Valley that the main character edited one line of code on his own project while at work, and he lost an entire lawsuit because of it. It’s a work of fiction, but there’s probably some truth to certain events. I basically feel like a kid who just rented a game from blockbuster and played it for five minutes before going to school. Now I have to wait until school is out before I can play again.

I also know that after work I’ll be physically and mentally drained of energy so it’s going to be a lot harder to work on LG2MT. My friend also invited me to gym today, he says he wants to drive me to his own gym like 30 minutes from here. I said okay. It makes no sense, I don’t know why we’d drive 30 minutes one way, 30 minutes back. Waste of time.

There’s also 3 letters I have to mail out today. I don’t think I have enough stamps to ship them all. Energy. Draining.

I’m still in the office but I’m signing out of work now. I am still on that Udacity quiz about using Grunt, ImageOptim, and ImageMagick to reduce the dimensional size of the images and also reduce the filesize. I mean it’s giving me a headache. Basically they had one video showing how they used it, and now they are saying, okay now use it. These are all command line interface commands and I don’t know how to use them. I tried getting Grunt to work, it kept erroring on me. I mean I can write my own image resizer, they should at least have a tutorial on how to use each one of these software.

Yeah! It took forever, but I was finally able to figure out ImageMagick and wrote a batch script that would reduce the image sizes to 25% each. The tutorials were completely useless. I had to type in random commands to figure out that “Magick” is the word used to run ImageMagick on the command line. I kept trying ‘Convert -resize “25%” volt.jpg volt.jpg” and nothing. After typing in random commands, “Magick convert -resize “25%” volt.jpg volt.jpg” worked. I read through the freaking manual / tutorial on the website and didn’t see any mention of the “Magick” command. Well, I just checked back on the documentation and it this teeny tiny note under the Windows installer…. Great.

Anyway, typing in “for %f in (*.jpg) do magick convert -resize “25%” %f %f” applied that command for all the files in the folder. Task done. I also used ImageOptim to compress all the images. It didn’t really do anything. There was only one file that was made smaller, the rest were the same size.

Well that’s it for my Udacity assignments for today. I’ll work on the CSS section tomorrow, this part took me forever to figure out. Geez. It didn’t have to be so hard. Time to work on LG2MT again. Fun :).

Crap. Well. I was having the time of my life. Listening to music. Writing code that I enjoy writing. I was testing it and it was running well. The code is clean, elegant, it looks and reads so beautifully. I was having a blast. Then my friend texts and says to come downstairs. F—… That just ruins everything. My flow is gone. Seriously. I have to stop everything I’m doing – right in the middle of my most productive time, and I have to go downstairs…

This is roughly 2 hours later. Guess what happened? NOTHING. I didn’t even work out. 30 minutes was spent driving to his gym, and they kicked us out when I didn’t have a key with me. Okay. So then we spent another 30 minutes back, and after like 10 minutes inside of the office gym, I just didn’t feel like working out anymore so I went home. The drive home was around 30 minutes. There’s 30 extra minutes in there for other stuff, there’s always that fluff of time that just vanishes without you even knowing. Time to keep on working on the LG2MT project. It’s not going to get done by tonight, so I will just manually paste this entire thing into each one of the journal websites.

Another two hours later. I actually spent a majority of that time writing in the private journal entry. I wrote 3300+ words. It’s one of the deepest and most emotional writings I’ve ever undertook. I’ve done a few of them, but this is one of the deepest, if not the deepst. I mean I go really in depth. Really in depth. Whew. It is a mindstorm to read through.

I mean my LG2MT code is almost perfect, it works wonderfully well. I just had more of an emotional outburst than anything tonight, and it was channeled into my private entry. I don’t really think I have anything else to say, other than LG2MT is still a work in progress. And that, I guess now I’m just going to have to manually post this into all of the websites today. Sigh.


Selfie for the day

4 thoughts on “Journal Day 23”

  1. Wow. It’s amazing that you’ve done all this stuff at such a young age, even though they’re gone now! Also, writing and posting things online is the best thing; I hope you keep it up.

  2. That’s so cool you did all those things! I did mostly the same things, but on a lower level. I made YouTube videos with not a bad amount of views for someone starting out and although it isn’t WoW, ever since I was 11, I was a moderator or admin on some Minecraft servers. Currently an Admin now and will be promoted where I’d get payed for it soon, and usually the owner does not do that, so I’m flattered she feels that way 😀 And you’re not a creep haha, I talk to a lot of people who are much older than me. Good luck with your program (LG2MT)!

  3. Thank you PrettyInBlack for your comment. I don’t know. Life is long and confusing, it’s a long hard road. I was able to do those things because the opportunity lay in front of me – I’m not seeing any doors open at the moment (I explain why in my latest post)

  4. Observant Bystander, well. I just noticed. If you look at former presidents – you’ve never heard of them ever again after their term. Look at the retired sports stars – never heard from again. People can do amazing things ONCE in their life, and then be forgotten for the rest of time. Look at the school you go to – someone built that for you, but who? You don’t know. They spent a lot of money for it too.

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