Day 5 after surgery. Cant believe what I found also…

Okay lets start of with what i found the day after his surgery. Being nosey (and i usually am not) i found a bottle of half used women’s victoria secret perfume in his car. Now the question is what is it doing there? I would’ve lve noticed it before a couple weeks ago when we were in the back of his trunk. Problem is i cant confront him because of all the drama we’ve had recently and his surgery last Friday has given him so many headaches that the last thing i want to do is cause more issues. Lets be real would he even answer right on who’s it is? He probably is going to say that its his nieces perfume, so is it even worth asking.

Well as of now the bottle is in my apt hidden in a bag. I was going to hold off till way past thanksgiving and his surgery. I know people are probably thinking ‘girl, you need to leave him if you cant talk to him’. Its easier said then done and i do have to admit that i have been wrong in the past, not always but i have. 

Now on to today or at least the past few days. We’ve been chilling for the most part and not doing much since he’s been getting a lot of vertigo due to his ear surgery. Dunno its kinda weird but he tends to take a long time in the bathroom and is up all night on his phone. Most would say that it is suspicious activity and yes we have had an issue in the past but for the most part He plays alot of chess and pinochle online. Guess it sucks cause the trust is not there. Not completely but some of it is gone from past doings.

He’s been in a good mood with me for the most part. Probably cause he is stuck here with me but he’s es been cool acting. As usual its most likely short lived, not to be negative just kinda know the cycle.

Tomorrow is thanksgiving and im already feeling bad cause I think we are gonna go our own thing apart as the past 3 years. If so it will not be a good thing for me or my feelings. Guess we will have to see cause I overheard him on the phone saying he might not be up for it cause of the way he is feeling. 

Im already kind of sad since my son left with his sister to go to my moms tomorrow and I miss my dad already. I know I usually don’t chill with him for thanksgiving for the past few years but just knowing I never will ever again, is saddening. 



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