I have just got in from my first AA meeting since deciding to wave goodbye to my beloved friend alcohol three days ago.
It was as though my brain and thoughts had been removed from my head and scattered around the room. The people in the room shared their story’s and their feelings. The words that came from their mouths could of came from my own lips. I could really relate to them.
Loneliness, emptiness and lack of control when it comes to drinking.
Its still hard to get my head around not letting another drop of alcohol pass my lips. However what I did take away from the meeting was to take one day at a time, and more importantly be kind to myself.
For years I have punished myself, I have been full of self loathing and I’ve been incredibly self destructive.
I need to focus on myself and begin finding ways of curing my loneliness and developing myself. My aim is to keep busy and try and develop a structure so that I don’t ever have the chance to feel overwhelmed by emptiness
Alcohol it has been an emotional few years, but now is the time to wave goodbye.