What am I?

Okay, so, everybody knows the term fuckboy, right? Am I a fuckgirl?

This all started in early 2016 when I was just drinking with one of my friends and then had NSA sex with a guy I have known of my entire life, but i have never actually talked to. We lived in the same town for 18 years, but we never said a word to each other until we were both intoxicated.  I figured it was just a one time thing and never paid much attention to it. The same group of friends got together another weekend and were drinking and we had sex again, and then we did another weekend.  After the third time I started to wonder if there could possibly be anything more.  I’ve also wondered if it was because he liked me that we kept having sex whenever we drank together or if he just wanted sex and he didn’t care where it came from. Then I also realized that if he actually liked me he would’ve said something to me by now, but the other half of me wonders if he is just as shy as I am and doesn’t want to say anything.

Help.

Any and all suggestions/advice are welcome.

2 thoughts on “What am I?”

  1. Sweetheart, it sounds like you are doing things while drinking that you might not do sober. There is no communication between you and this boy (as far as I can tell.) Do you like him? It doesn’t sound like the good start of something special. Keep sober at least more sober than that night (nights). Don’t lose your control to alcohol. Stay in control and aware. And be bold. Ask him if he likes you. He should say so , if he does. But you might be best off just stopping the sex and waiting for someone you are in love with and who you KNOW cares about you deeply. Good luck, dear.

  2. @savedbygrace
    No, there is no communication. There’s a possibility I could like him if I got to know him, maybe. However, if our communication doesn’t branch out from drunken nights, then I am okay with that and understand the boundary of our relationship with each other.

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