Journal Day 38

Crap. So tired today and time is going by so fast. I now know why I always wake up around 6 AM in the morning despite me wanting to or not. It’s because that’s when the cars start driving by, it gets loud enough that I wake up without wanting to. Ear plugs help a lot, too bad I don’t know if I have any.

Yesterday morning I woke up with full energy despite waking up so early. Today though, I woke up extremely tired and groggy. I’m at work now and it’s hard for me to pay attention or come up with any new ideas to solving problems.

There was an issue that came in, a number wasn’t showing up as a decimal like it was supposed to. Usually this would be an insanely easy issue to fix, something I’ve done many times. The issue was on one of the more complicated projects I’ve worked on. Yeah, just looking at this monster, i don’t even fully remember how it worked. Of course I can figure it out again, it would just take a while.

I’m glad the issue was minor, there was just this one thing I had to fix. I tried different ways of fixing it and they all failed. In the end the solution came from another number that DID behave correctly, and I just copied similar attributes to this number, it worked. It took over an hour to figure out, usually I’d solve problems like these in minutes.

I just came back from a less than 30 minute nap in the quiet room, I skipped lunch. What woke me up was this strange feeling you might have gotten yourself when you take a nap in the afternoon. It’s this weird feeling where blood starts coursing all around your body and you start to feel everything at once when just a moment ago you were numb to touch. You also become more empathetic, you start caring about others more and realize your mortality, that you should get up and stop wasting time, connect with others.

I couldn’t care about talking to anybody the entire day, I was so tired. Before taking my nap for example, there was a co-worker who asked me to lunch, I told him I was too tired to eat anything. While taking a nap I felt that strange feeling urging me to get up and connect and as soon as I left the quiet room I talked to the first person outside. It was a co-worker from Australia that was coming by to visit. We’ve communicated lots of times through email because of work reasons, and he was here for a few weeks. He’s been here since Monday along with other folks from Australia, and I just never talked to him despite many opportunities this week. After that feeling though, I went up and talked to him for a while, he was glad to meet me for the first time.

Yeah. Weird. This is moments later and I’m sitting down at my desk. I feel pretty good now. I’ve talked to a few people, people are talking to me. World flipped upside down from how I felt this morning. I’m not even going up to people, people are coming up to me and smiling and talking… It’s weird how vibes can change people how people react around you. The entire day I’ve been avoiding people and not wanting to talk, and people avoided me. Now that I want to talk, people come and talk to me.

I talked to my co-worker Person’s Name who was leaving the company several times today. I made sure she felt special today. I told her to tell her original stories of being in the company during her first year here, and people listened. The new people were surprised and laughing at the events in the stories. They were pretty ridiculous. I already told her everything I wanted to yesterday, so there wasn’t anything for me to add.

I also had a meeting with the team lead and we just briefly discussed a lot of internal things. I told him about Person’s Name leaving and he was surprised I knew because he hadn’t announced it yet. Well she announced it to the team yesterday so our entire team knew. He suggested to throw a lunch party for her next week which I’m looking forward to. I don’t know how many lunch parties we’ve had, but I’ve been to a lot, and they’re very enjoyable.

Hmm, tomorrow will be my 2nd year anniversary at the company. Hmm. I’ve written about private things that Obs suggested might be too much information for now, so I just edited them out from last night’s (Journal 37) entry. But I’ll re-edit them back once the timing is appropriate.

I ended up leaving work around 4 PM, not feeling very tired, but feeling like there wasn’t much else to do. Of course there was still work for me to do, but I’m waiting for another person to complete their part before I can continue working on the current project. So there really wasn’t much for me left to do there, so I left.

The sky outside was dark and it was slightly raining. I had an hour to do something before I had to pick up my mom, so I drove over to the library to check if I had any late feeds and to read some books. I checked and had no late fees, so it was off for me to find more books. There was a book called “Gigs” that I stumbled upon, it was this massive book about people from the 90’s making long accounts of their profession. From reading parts of the book and what other people had to do, I didn’t know the world was so hard. To them I felt like a spoiled kid who gets to come in to work whenever and leave work whenever and gets free food from the office. The world just looked a lot more grim from their point of view and what they had to do each day. I wouldn’t want to do any of those jobs they described, they were so much harder than what I’m required to do. I think I’m spoiled.

I picked up another book called “The Way of the Turtle” which was a book on trading stocks. It was written by a man who made 31 million in profits when he was 19 years old, being the most successful in a group called the “Turtles”. The group was formed when two very wealthy men argued on whether stock trading could be taught or if you were born with it, the person who argued it could be taught set up a school where the chosen few would be taught special stock trading lessons. Using these lessons, the students were then to see how much profit they were able to get from the stock market. The author was the youngest and most successful in the group. The book became so interesting that I checked it out. I made a rule to only check out one book at a time.

Then I drove to pick up my mom, we drove home, and now I have to study. I have a few homework assignments due tonight, the need my full concentration to complete.

I just finished all but one homework assignment for the week. There’s one homework assignment left that’s due tomorrow night, so I’ll wait until tomorrow to complete it. I am just so tired now. One of the assignments tonight was a quiz that I got 99.88% on. Wow. I don’t know which question I missed, but apparently it counted for .12%.

Hmm… I think I’ll go to sleep now even though it’s only 8:00 PM. It’s raining outside meaning I can’t go outside for a walk or a jog, plus I’m very exhausted from getting only 3 hours or so of sleep last night. Not talking to Obs tonight but I hope she had a good day.


Selfie for the day

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