Today

I return back to a city I thought I will never return to. Full of despair and heart-break. It’s for a new job thankfully and I’ll be training most of the day. But when my free time hits I’ll wonder if I’ll ever see her again…what do I do…what do I say… I honestly don’t want to see her because I feel the pain slicing down my heart again and I can’t afford that. All my years work of getting out of the system (mental hospitals). All the countless therapy hours, medication and spending time alone. I just want to do my job and be left alone, I can not afford to see her. Because I know if I do see her it will feel like I got stabbed at the heart and left for dead. I prayed that I won’t encounter her but my fear will just grow as I get closer. Goodnight everybody. 

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