Sooooo I’m here again (although actually I’m always here. Lurking. Ghosting. In the shadows. Silently reading every single one of these public entries and internally Judging All Of You™ without commenting) and it’s time for me to post a semi-coherent rant about part of my Teenaged Aesthetic that no one asked for much less cares about. Here we go. *Ahem.*
I borrowed an anthology of poetry from the tiny library outside my school yesterday, after I exited the building with my best friend following my victory against The Final Boss Final: AP English III. Jk it was actually a spectacular defeat against TFBF because I fucked up the essay portion and I lost my point somewhere between the lines of my hurried-hurried handwriting. But I still went to the library and I borrowed the anthology, which is filled with the poetry of multiple American Poets Laureate–and another book about the basics of Japanese, which I’m hoping to sort-of learn during the break.
I like poetry and emotional song lyrics and if that doesn’t tell you what kind of teenager I am I don’t know what will, but anyway, I have to read more poetry if I want to get any better at it which is one of my sole purposes in life because writing. Gah, the FEELS I get from reading good writing. It’s the same feeling I get when I see someone who has gorgeous handwriting. It’s envy, but not in a negative, angry, despairing way–it’s the sort of “challenge accepted” envy that makes me want to run a marathon and work hard and make life my bitch.
I don’t write well but I want to, so I’m going to try to make it happen. After several hours of looking at various positive Tumblr posts, I think I’m feeling positive and dizzy enough to get off the Internet and actually go better myself now.
So have a good day and stay chill like I am right now because I’m DONE with everything and yes I am always Done™ internally with everything but right now I mean with school and Learning. Actually wait no. I have to study for the SAT which is in exactly one month. Oh yeah. So there’s that but I’ll THINK ABOUT THAT LATER so BYE FOR NOW.