I’ve finally moved out of Bumfuck, Georgia. However, I didn’t get to Tennessee. Instead, I am in a beachside city in South Carolina and I honestly kind of hate it up here. Or rather, I hate my jobs, living situation and the fact that there’s nobody here in this tourist town. I will get to Tennessee, eventually. This is a fact. I’ve just hit a minor bump in the road. However, I gotta say that despite my struggling financially (Two jobs, off-season beach town = no business and very few hours), I don’t fear losing my jobs. They’re temporary. They’re stupid and trivial and don’t pay jack shit. I have no intentions of a career in either of them. I’ve come to realize that even though times are hard…Fuck it. I’m still fairly young. I’m not completely drowning in debt (I’m down on my luck atm but I know I can find something that pays a little better), I have no children or relationship…I have very few responsibilities and nothing really tying me down. In fact, I’m trying to nut up and quit one of them…It’s a job in a candy shop. I don’t fear losing the job, but I still have anxiety when it comes to actually confronting anyone about anything. I should probably just rip that bandaid off…Just say I quit and let that be that.
Seriously, the candy store sucks. The customers are actually pretty great. I like the place itself. I’m surrounded by neon colors, buckets of candy, and loud pop music. Happy, right? My coworkers are somehow ASSHOLES. Mostly this bitch Keegan. This bleeding cunt feels the need to correct everything I do, act com-PLETELY and utterly exasperated if I ask for ANYTHING, and she has the NERVE to completely, blatantly ignore me if I say anything that’s not a question. I could make a simple comment about something and she could be standing a foot away, and she’ll act like I hadn’t said a word. Won’t even blink in my direction. Then there’s Nathan. Beautiful Nathan. Holy shit fucking hot Nathan. I’ve had impure thoughts about him since I first laid eyes on him and I really wish that I could have worked more with HIM and less with that shitbag Keegan. I think he might be a little too cool for me, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting him to ask me to step aside for a quick word, taking me to the backroom and fucking me senseless. But even he won’t keep me there, working in a place I hate. That might be for the best too. Less longing and sexual frustration on my part.
My other job is at a shoe store. The customers there are the biggest knobs ever. A bunch of entitled asswipes looking for Uggs and Sperry boots. My fellow employees are quick to turn on each other and my manager is borderline insane. I’m always getting yelled at over the dumbest things.
I need money. But, I’m not so desperate that I’m willing to stay in a place that makes me completely miserable. I learned the hard way that life is too short. I completely wasted 3 years of my life in an awful job that messed me up physically and emotionally. Never again. It’s impractical and possibly even stupid of me, but life is just too damn short to be miserable allthefreakingtime. I just can’t bring myself to get hysterical over my jobs. I’ve tried to tell myself what will happen if I lose one of your jobs…And then I tell myself “Don’t sweat it. They’re shitty retail Jobs and you can replace them just like they could replace you. Dime a dozen, no biggie.”
Now I have a sin to confess: I just spent some money that I really shouldn’t have spent, on something that I really don’t need. Specifically, two Jeffree Star lip colors. But hey. In my defense…Bitch at least I’ll look fabulous.