SHE

Who is “she”? Is she just a figment of my imagination? Does she really exist? When I think of her, I get lost in time. Always thinking of “forever”, a happily ever after. She is the most beautiful person I’ve ever encountered, the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. It’s like she came from space, an unknown place. I don’t say heaven because that would imply that she is perfect and her flaws are what make her beautiful. Imperfectly perfect and not sorry for anything. Without knowing it, she shines bright. Without trying, she has invaded my heart, my thoughts infinitely. Where did she come from? How did she get here? When we’re together, nothing else matters, I’m in euphoria. A smile that outshines the sun, a laugh that could be heard from miles around. Eyes that challenge the brightest diamonds, yet they have a fire in them that can never be put out. She has words that cut like a knife but also bring joy. There is a mystique which keeps me drawn, I want to know more, to solve the puzzle. There is no lock and there is no key, that would be cliche. And she is far from ordinary. No she demands respect, she couldn’t care less about having attention. She is her own woman, a true hustler. But this is what makes things so interesting, I have to think outside of the box. Do I have the mental stamina to keep going? How long will this last? Will it be worth it? Can I make it to the end? These are questions that I’m not sure can be answered. But I’m not worried about these questions. SHE is the only thing that matters. SHE is my finish line, SHE is my pot of gold. I will go to the ends of the earth, hoping she will turn her attention to me. I will swim every ocean, hoping she will not drown me. Should she ever shun me, I would truly be broken. She is all I think about, even when we’re together. Will she ever truly be mine? I’ve never felt this way before, yet this feels so natural to me. Like I’ve been here before. Is this deja vu? Or is my mind playing tricks on me and creating something that isn’t even real? She is my best friend, someone who I confide in. But she doesn’t confide in me. No she’s broken, she’s been ignored, left on the side of the road. So she laughs at opening up, she doesn’t want to be seen as weak. To be seen as vulnerable would mean that she wouldn’t be in control. She lives to be the driver, but deep down, she wishes someone would take the wheel. She longs to be held, to be taken care of. But she would never say this, she would never show it. She can’t hide it from me, I’ve known this for awhile now. She is already mine, even if she doesn’t believe it. I’m the one who will bring her guard down. It’s only a matter of time. For now, I will keep my distance and not push too hard. Because SHE is everything to me. SHE has my heart…

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