I closed on my house today. I took a 1/2 day off. I also went to the post office, the cable office, and the bank to deposit the check. I had to sit at the closing table with Brent. I just tried not to look at him. He is such an asshole. I really don’t understand – I know I never will. What the fuck ever. I am so hopeful that getting the hell out of here will help me be able to move on. My heart is broken. I am not sure if I will ever be happy again. I have to get out of here. I am upset about that bitch at school that is going to take over my team leader job- sending out emails to the team and leaving me off! Um, I still work there until January 20th. I fucking hate her. I felt like crying over the way she is cutting me out, but I won’t. My asshole boss already is so unbelievably sexist I refuse to give him more ammo. He thinks all women are “drama queens”. I hate his ass, too.
Just Keep Swimming
I am a 48 year old adult child of an alcoholic. My childhood could have been a Lifetime movie. I am dealing with PTSD, anxiety, and severe depression as a result. I am working on gaining an understanding as to what this means and learning how to be okay with myself. Some days, just killing myself and being done with it seems like the most sensible option. On those days, I keep telling myself, "just keep breathing in and out, that's enough for today."