Looking Back

January, 2017

  Well, it’s getting to be the end of January. This may be the last post I make for this month so I thought I would just look back and reflect on things that have been going on recently. On the plus side, I am definitely noticing some improvement in my ability to block out these voices (or control this unwanted clairaudience) at least some of the time. When the voices first hit back in 2015, the voices were so intense back then, I had no control over hearing them at all. They were just too strong at first, there was really little that I could do except endure the onslaught.

  Fortunately, with time the intensity of the voices has subsided considerably. However, they are still a day to day presence for me. But, I find that now much of the time, I’m able to at least block out the content of what they are saying. Ignoring them is a very important part of eventually getting a handle upon the situation but, I found this to be a difficult thing for me to do at first. Now, the ability to ignore them just seems to be coming to me more naturally with time. This is not to say that hearing these intrusive voices is still not a problem for me. But, I have noticed some improvement in my ability to handle this aspect of the situation.

  In regards to the physical/bodily disturbances, unfortunately I don’t have much good news there. If anything, these entities seem to be giving a bit more focus towards the physical disturbances than the voices these days. It can be terribly annoying when I’m trying to sleep. I still have to take a sleep-aid practically every night just to get any sleep. Fortunately, though, the sleep-aid has been working well recently. I haven’t had an incident where the sleep-aid failed and I was kept awake by these entities for an entire night in quite a while (knock on wood). So as of now, the battle for sleep continues pretty much the same.

  This month is the start of a new year and I had made some resolutions to myself that I was going to give up a few bad habits, mainly smoking cigarettes and drinking beer. I have used both over the last two years to try and take the edge off this situation at least a bit, but physically I just feel really out of shape and worn down. I suppose in the beginning I just regarded them as a necessary part of facing this situation, but by now both of these habits are quite detrimental to me.

  Unfortunately, I haven’t gotten around to quitting these two things as of yet. I should have by now, I’m slacking I admit. I had a run of bad luck there for a while this month. The heating in my condo broke down right before a snow storm, some typical aggravation with my job, where usually the winter is the slowest time for me (at work) so it’s a good time to quit since there is usually less aggravation with that, but this year it seems like the bullshit is hitting early. Then there was some “mystery glitch” with my bank account where some money just seemed to disappear into thin air. I’m still trying to sort that one out, but it left me strapped for cash for a little while.

  These are all just normal bullshit things. Bullshit things are always going to occur so I can’t let it be an excuse but unfortunately, I did use it as an excuse this month to put off my New Year’s resolutions. I’ll try for next month and hopefully I’ll get my act together.  So, all in all, I’d say this month showed some promising signs of improvement as far as my situation with dealing with these voices (aka “them”) but other aspects of it did not change that much. But, I am optimistic and hopeful that things will continue to improve with all of this. Compared to 2015, things are way more stable and mellow now and I am certainly glad for that.

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