January 17, 2017
So life has been better. I still sometimes feel unmotivated but I’ve been managing. Sister in law has been driving me absolutely mad.
I wish I could take in my niece and nephew. If I had the resources I would adopt them in a heart beat. They are taken care of I guess and lived but not how I would do it. They are constantly moving never knowing where there going to be. Not going to school because it doesn’t fit into my sister in laws schedule. I just want to take them in and take care of them and nurture them. They are extremely loved and are fed, clothed and sheltered but other things tend to fall short. It makes me crazy knowing there bouncing around all the time.
my husband and I have made plans in 2 years when we own a home we can look into adopting my niece maybe my nephew. But, what if it’s to late, what if these kids have behavioral problems by this time we can’t control. What about my family … We adopt 2 kids and do I really want to have 3? I always wanted 2 kids of my own so the real question do I really want 4?
This all makes me feel selfish, If I have to I should adopt them. But I want my family to! I am 23 thinking of adopting a 7 and 6 year old… That’s a huge responsibility. Idk I just I wish there life was different so my husband and I didn’t feel like we were being put in this situation. Then it’s all about if the sister would let us because as I said she loves her children. I don’t know I wish sometimes that this was more black and white not gray situation.