I have had qquite a few good days now. Things are improving between my husband and I. We have had our rocky days over the last few months, but thats to be expected when we both suffer with depression and thats not to mention the amount of stuff we have had to endure over the last year or so. So for the last few days I am thankful. Long may it continue.
Yesterday my sister took my daughter out to a technology convention, when she got home she was puking everywhere. There is no job in the world tougher than being a mother. Waking up every two hours with a baby then having to clean up piles of sick from every surface inbetween, while trying not to add to the pile with your own addition as you try to clean another humans rejected food. Turns out my sister gave her cola while they were out, despite knowing her intolerance to it. I feel like putting it all in a bag and bringing it around to her house and spraying it across her beloved home. But I’m not that cruel. Plus it means I would have to handle the sick way more than I ever wanted to.
So currently I am sitting on the couch, the baby sleeping peacefully next to me, my daughter up in bed recovering, my husband trying to catch up on some sleep after staying up until 4am with me and the kids. I know he is great and such a hands on dad, he looks after us better than anyone could even attempt. But I cant help feeling resentful when he gets a full 7 hours unbroken sleep, and here I am functioning on 3-4 hours of broken sleep. Then I feel guilty for having naps during the day and wasting precious family time. But hey, that’s my think to deal with. I can’t expect him to have broken sleep just because I am. That would just be bonkers. It’s just that illogical resentment that stands there waving at me with a banner.
The baby is awake now so I have to go tend to him. Hopefully today will improve, after my 3 loads of laundry and ironing. wooo!! And people think I am lazy for not working…. PAH!