Sinking in

King was a mess when I met him in HS. He got into drugs and alcohol.  Nonadult guidance if there was, they were supporting his habit.  I knew he was broken.  I like a challenge. Lots of people will look from outside and say “WHY? He is this, he is that, you deserve better” and I do…but doesn’t he also? How many people have walked away because he is a pain in the ass?  It just reinforces that he is unloveable, not worth it, usless.  How horrible would that be?  It is horrible, I know because he projects those feelings on to me.  I was reinforced as a child that I could do anything, that I was smart, talented, worthy of love and praise.  This drives me.  Yes, I get down sometimes, but I will continue to get up and fight. 

Things are sinking in with him.  He heard what I had to say.  I see that he got something, even if it’s just one thing that he retains, it is just another glimmer of hope.  He has been helping with the kids more. He had been helping me more. 

Things are sinking in. Little by little.  He is worth love. He is worth the fight. 

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