My sense of realism, in personal sight, is my greatest weakness.
It cripples my thoughts into visions of potential catastrophe.
It hurts. Looking around seeing people dreaming of what they want & what they believe is a possibility.
I sit observing what is occurring around me & I start to build my mental files of every person that sticks out in my mind. Most I know not their names, but their face, oh the faces always imprint into my mind.
I learn people, I get to know them without knowing them personally… who they REALLY are.
I’m learning about me too, though I’m not so good with pinpointing myself.
I don’t like this knowledge I gain, knowing how the world REALLY is.
The world IS beautiful, but the beauty is running out.
People sucking what they can out of anything that shows them kindness.
Why am I am to see this when others live so blissfully imaginative?
Many dreams are not possible & the inhabitants of this world are so disgustingly naturally selfish, even myself. But I can see this. Why can’t others?
They think what they can gain, what they can be, what all can come to their good.
I see what will NEVER happen.
Why do I see what is so impossible for myself while the next person honestly believes they can do anything?
Why is image so quickly absorbed before actual internal content?
I want to live in a dream so badly, yet here I am living in observation of the hideous truth.