Failing Gym

Ok so the plan to hang out with that guy didn’t happen. And well I actually don’t regret not asking him, because I had a really great time with my friends in the city. After bonding with them, and having so much fun, I got home and the fun kind of ended. 

My teacher had called home to my parents to tell them that I will fail in PE if i dont start attending. So this tuesday (yesterday) I ditched the two hour gym class (physical education) to go to the city and see if I could find a ice field were I can ice skate. Unfortunatly I didn’t find anything. 

THE POINT IS im failing in gym and it will bring my whole entire final card down. Which sucks. Still I just can’t push myself to have gym together with the others. It’s not like im bad at it or anything, its just the anxiety. Social anxiety? I’m not sure but Its just too much pressure for me to handle. I really do not know what to do. Last year we had a different teacher that understood and tried different ways were I can train alone. But since he is not here anymore, thats no longer an option (i asked). Honestly have no idea what to do, goddanmit, why did I bring this shit upon myself?

Tomorrow im going to talk to the school nurse about it. But I’m not exacly sure what to say. I don’t know how to explain what im feeling or what I think about this whole situation. And after school my parents are coming aswell and we are going to have a meeting with the school nurse about the whole entire anxiety thing. Still dont know what to say, and im afraid its just going to be really really awkward. 

But hey, tomorrow isnt going to be super anxiety filled with just nervewrecking stuff. The last two hours of school I’m doing a group project that is actually very fun, and im looking forward to it. Also after the meeting with the nurse and my parents im planning on going iceskating. Yes iknow, i feel very lucky. After searching around the whole city looking for a place to ice skate, i finally found one. 

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