I believe I am cursed. Saying that sounds as crazy to me as it does everyone else but it is the only thing that explains my life. 

I am sitting here writing this in a ‘closet’ in my dad and step moms house. A dad that before last month I hadnt seen since I was 5 and a step mom I just met. They already have a strained relationship and me being here is making it worse. I have nowhere to go. Really since I am an adult that is my problem but a lot lead up to me being here. My step mom drinks and when she has had too much she gets angry and past few days that anger has been focused on me. So of course I get upset and then my dad wants to know why I am upset and I am upset because I am upsetting my step mom which leads to them fighting. Now my dad is pissed and not talking to me, my step mom thinks I am some evil villain and this was my master plan. They are talking about divorce, which would lead to me being homeless, again… Not much of an evil genius if this is my master plan. I am the one that would lose out the most here. I have probably spent the past 24 out of 48 hrs crying. It looks like I have 2 black eyes. I havent eaten since thursday morning and only had an hour of sleep. I have spent the past few hrs crying and begging and trying to fix something that I am not sure how or if I broke. This all started with me going to the kitchen to get water…

Part of me wants to sit here and type it all, get it all out. Tonight though I am so drained and not knowing what I will wake up to. If I will wake up to normal or WWIII. If I will even have a roof over my head to finish typing it all. I want to rest while I can too in case its my last chance to but I am so pumped up from crying and fear. Maybe tomorrow I will start at the beginning or maybe tomorrow I wake up to calling shelters again. I wish I had some stability.


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