Blame yourself, not the country, Chapter 11 by Dr. Julito Tigley


                                Love, sentiments and emotions


                                                 Chapter 11


After his productive sojourn in his village, he went back to the City to report to the PNP Provincial Command. Although he had excitements in his stay there, but in his mind rumbled or swung the notions, how he was welcome, and remembering the many beautiful women who adored him. But he could not believe also that one of his friend succumbed to death, because of love. Maybe, his world is only so small, and the completeness of it ends, was in a deadly conclusions.


Love has told so many stories. Some impressed us in a very delicious fashion that one can always be happy, but behind it is a doom color that everyone must have to be on the look out. Pete could have still be alive, had Elena approved to his desires. But not all, losers and winners will ever exist in the same incidence. Elena could not sleep, and sometime, she felt guilty. But knowing that, approving is a self destructive choice, it will reverse right away her mental grasp of the occurrence.


She is planning now to go to Davao, just to take part of the teacher seminar, and at the same time, she wanted to see Efren for some enlightenment. She knew that Cefriano, his brother has access to him, because he is a subordinate. And most of all, she finds some refuge being close to him. Not only that she has an eye but her feeling is overwhelmed, and being away is tantamount to sacrifice. She packed her belongings, and prepared her permit papers for the travel.


Three days after, and it was July 23, one of the rainy days of 1994, she was already inside the bus, that will transport her to the City. Her feeling was mixed up with anxiety and eagerness, but her desires to see his prince charming was his principal thought in her mind. She is also bringing the album of pictures, and she put in front the pictures, where she and him, was sitting beside each other in a rock overlooking the Zigzagging River, a panoramic view in their place.


Her brother, Cefriano, picked her up at the terminal. And she was billeted in his home. It was a small house, with two bedrooms, at any rate, her brother, who is married, has still no children. His wife is also very good, behave and fine. She is very fond of her. Quickly, Cefriano, called Efren at the telephone, “Sir, sorry sir, I wasn’t able to report this morning. I’ll be there this afternoon. I fetched my sister in the Terminal. She is her for a one week Seminar, at the DEC regional office.” And Efren answered enthusiastically, “don’t worry, about that. Is she already in your home? Tell her, we will have dinner tonight? Ok?”





Meanwhile, Bayani was very elated, when he received a note from Clara. He reads, “I am so sorry, of my being so rude to you, maybe, because I was infatuated to your brother, but now that I realized that we are not meant to each other, I wanted now to be your friend. But please, don’t misinterpret it as an advance to something great. Don’t tell this to anybody.” But what is in his mind lurking is the feeling of suspicion, because He had been courting her for a long time, yet this is the first time he received a very pleasant words. At the back of his house is a Star apple tree, and also he devised a small cradle, and while he was sitting there, fronting him was a hill, so green, that in his eyes refreshed it a memory of their first impression about the place. Exactly, it made some pictures in his imaginations, a view of the place, and only he and Clara were roaming around, touching the newly unfolded flowers, at the edge of running crystal water.


Then, thereafter, his ego became so strong, and the will to see Clara was now a big source of his impulse.


In Davao City, in a Chinese Buffet Resto, Efren and Elena have their dinner. Cefriano did not go with them for a confidential reason. Efren took also the advantage, because it will put his time to be emotionally close to the lady. “Elena, if you like seafoods, you can find it in the other table. But I brought shrimps, for the two of us.” Elena smiled in admirations; “I love it especially if it comes from my hero… no, no… joke only.” She showed it truthfully. While eating Efren surprisingly slide his hands to the thigh of Elena, and Elena felt the electricity. She said, “I know what you mean, but not now.” 

And in his conception, he believed that they are already on. They talked about life in the barrio, and later, the topic concerning Pete.  Elena said, “I am guilty, because in the last night before Pete died, he paid me a visit, and it was at that time, I decided to be frank on him. I told him that I don’t love him, and if there is anybody I would love, it is only Efren. The truth is, he cried and went home and said, Good bye.” And she continued, “I am here, because I know you love me, am I right? “. Efren startled, with a smile he said; “I will love you forever, and I am very willing to marry you anytime at your choice.”


Just for a good relaxation, Efren rented a car, so that they can roam the City for one day. They went to some night spots, before they accommodated themselves in a motel. Elena is prepared to any eventuality, because the man she is with is her dream. He kissed her before they reclined together. While he held her tightly, He was already groping the breast, and the hands also of Elena are untying the belt until such time that both of them were already completely undressed. Maybe because of so much love, Efren sucked whatever skin closer to his lips, and Elena was also busy holding the masculine organ, preparing for the grand finale.


In the morning, they left the motel and returned to Cefriano’s home. Before Efren left he stayed for while and had their usual kiss.


The government at that time, under the administration of President Ramos showed some signs of economic improvement. The world now recognized the Country as one of the most democratic nation in Asia. Rebels were no longer perceived as a threat although the organization was still intact. Some of those are still roaming in the mountain, but no longer seizing towns or camps. There was majority acceptance of the regime, and lots of investors came in, erecting buildings, or developing business villages, almost in every Cities. Cebu became the most boom city, and Davao also followed its fate.


The whole nation’s crime rate is low, and mostly petty, and sometime a number could only be dealt with at the barrio level. The village police was very active, and participated in crime solving. But the level of drug addiction showed a threat. The Mayor of Davao found out that the said threat should be contained with as possible. The Police were summoned by the mayor. Plans were implemented, but the problem still exists. Many young kids were indulged on drugs and solving it needs help by the national Government. But since the Government showed some flaws, a group of unknown personalities find themselves in the headlines as Vigilantes. People of questionable character, who were roaming the villages and those who had some criminal records, were hunted and, the killing begun. The killing was reported to the Mayor, and he will just nod his head. This group is presumed to be the mayor’s   creations and it made the situation more horrifying. Some were shot on going home or just outside at the vicinity of their residence. And the shooter are motorcycle riders, one will alight and shoot the target. Every incidence, the Police always called a puzzle. Media practitioners called it monster or predator, because the victims were adjudged by their own hands. Efren became confused by the situation. He asked to be assigned but the Provincial command advised him not to be a nuisance.


A new group emerged, and this is the anointed liquidator of the Communist Party. By propaganda, they started blaming the government, by diverting justice, and those who were killed were innocents. In the mountain, they also started killing those trained and assigned paramilitary units, who are molesting barrio folks. Their leader is known as Komander Islag. Some of the Town was very much afraid because the Police were disarmed many times.


Two years after, Bayani sent a message to his brother, telling him that he is about to be married. And Clara is the woman. He thanks him for his help. He asked him to be with him on the engagement party. “Sure, I’ll be there. I am even thinking about my wedding too. But yours will be the first.” That was the answer of Efren.


So, by the All soul’s day, Bayani went to the Cemetery just to pay a visit to his mother. In the cemetery, before he arrived, he saw a group of young teenagers, putting flowers to his mother. He was also pleased, because most of the time, he is not bringing flowers to his mother. When he was about to go closers, those young kids were just lost. In amazement, he tried to gaze around, to find out what happen. He saw them again walking as they climbed the hill at the back of the Cemetery. He just nods his head. He said some few words as if he was notifying his mother that he is happy to be married soon.


At home, he made letters to his father to come soon because he needed him. And also to ask him that after his marriage, Clara and he can stay in the house. It was just a letter of courtesy, and a respect to the family.






His wedding is dated on the last Saturday of June, and it will be already 1998. Bayani now is free to come anytime in the house, and Clara’s parents accept him like they are already married. And they are perfectly engaged to each other. Sometimes, he brings fuel, or pitch water, either watering the plants around the house. Clara also is free to come to his house, because there is a time that they needed their body, as what they have tasted already. But they organized themselves not to conceive until such time they are blessed.


Efren in his office received a letter from Elena. It was handed to him by her brother. Cefriano did not waste time to deliver it to him. And he opened it, and in it, the content was full of regrets, because in the end it was very straight and concise. The letter, “ Efren we had been together, most of the time, we never worried about ourselves because I consider you already as my husband, but this is blatantly wrong, for reason that we are not blessed. Now we can not dodge the truth, because in my belly something is already moving. And I have no menstruation for three month already. I went to my family doctor, and it was found out that I am pregnant. Now tell me, are we not going to get married, or I’ll follow the fate of Pete?” In response, via telegram, he said, “I am marrying you, Ill be there right away”.


A 5 fully uniformed personnel alighted in the Barrio, and the people was a bit scared, because it was long already that they have seen constables visiting their place, except Efren. When Chairman Pio heard it, he went right away to the church to find out. One of the PNP approaches him and said, “Sir, we are just personnel of Major Duhay Lunsod, we don’t have any mission here.”  “Where is he?”  “He is there at his home.”


Chairman Pio went to see him. “Efren, Is there anything we can do for you? And what happen?” Efren told him, “Come upstairs”. They were hugging, and embraced him until he was seated. Then, he opened it by saying, “ Manong, Please go with me to Elena’s house, because I will now tell his parents about our intent to get married. That is the reason why we are here.” Chairman Pio sighed in relief and said, “That is one thing I can not refuse you for that,”


The Parents of Elena were all at home, and they also one of the villagers, who were flabbergasted by the sudden emergence of Constables in their place, knowing that their place had received a trophy for being the most peaceful village in the town. Elena’s Papa Totong and her Mom, Mama Inciang, were in the window, looking at the distant coming of Chairman Pio, with Efren in his embrace. “Maayong Bunta diha, Mare Inciang ug asa man si Kumpadre Totong?.” ( good morning Mare Inciang, and where is Kumpadre totong?








Totong and Enciang received them in their Sala. “ What’s new Chairman? Is there anything we can be of help?” And “Efren we are very lucky to have you here. I have heard that other villages now are very concerned, about the siege of Kumander Islag and one of my nephew in the next village was killed.” and Chairman Pio told them, “Efren is not here about that. He is here to see Elena, and to talk things about them in front of you”. The Parents were so shocked and excited, then shouts “ Elena! Elena! Your Efren is here.”. Then Elena gets out from his room. “You sit there.”  “Now chairman what are things about them”. Efren with no sense of ambiguity said, “I am marrying Elena, and we want to talk to you about this.” And without hesitations, Elena told her parents. “We are marrying by next month at whatever place, Pa and Ma, because I am pregnant and I don’t want to wear a gown with a big belly.” The parents could not say, no, for after all, they like Efren so very much. “We are very much all right with that, and we will give you the right to prepare everything” Then, they set the date that by Last Sunday next month is the date.


There was no question on both sides, and they both agreed the same date. Efren stayed in the house of Elena as if the parents accepted him now as part of the family. As usual, Elena is now very busy, and Chairman Pio announced it to the village, about the incoming marriage of the two. One of those who were shocked was Bayani, because he too is marrying, and never realized that Efren will be marrying ahead of him. But Efren briefed him about his case, and the ceremony should be done as early as possible. He returned to Davao, just to prepare himself also. He wanted to leave for a month, by reasons that his office is still in code red. As the saying goes, “ we are born in this world in pairs, and to those who has none, their pair might have left already.”




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