After i think about it i do remember seeing you sniff paint or anything you can get your hands on. I had the image that you were the perfect parent but no you weren’t. I see the mistakes you took and now got me wondering How could you leave us? You knew you were gonna die after every kid you had. The doctor told you but you still did it anyway. You should of put us first mom, how could you of done that? You left all of us behind, without a mom, I was just a kid and didn’t understand. I’m grown now and this shit hurts and its killing me inside Ma. I looked up to you ma. How do you explain a 7 year old seeing her mother on that table and when i went to you all i remember is you were COLD. Your kids were split up and were all fucked up now because you made that decision to leave us. I want answers but no one to talk too as no one want to talk about it. The pain is still there but we can’t move on because we disowned one another. Are you happy now Ma? See your kids in pain? You just left us Ma! Why would you leave us? Even Dad lost his mind and every time he ask for you Ma. How do you think that made us feel. Having to explain to our own father that you no longer here. Guess i will never know How could you leave us? or even Why you did?