things on my mind

i. recently i found out that zoe is dating this boy we know. it probably shouldn’t bother me but it kind of does. i lost my chance. it bugs me though, does zoe have any friends that are purely platonic or are friendships just a way to start dating? why did zoe not tell me? am i no longer their friend at all, now that they have a boyfriend? i don’t even know the details, but it just bothers me.

ii. i have no friends. it’s kind of sad. i have free cheesecake but no one to share it with. i literally posted on instagram that i want to get cheesecake with someone and nobody said they would go with me.

iii. i’m a failure. bad grades, bad hygiene, bad social scene. my life isn’t bad exactly, but it isn’t good at all.

 iv. probably everyone hates me now. i don’t mean to but i guess i just push people away. there might be something to being one of those people who just wants to date. if i had just said yes maybe my life would be more interesting.

v. i might be asexual. i don’t know.

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