“I don’t wanna ask too much or be to bold And I don’t want to weight you down with a heavy load”
I laid awake in the silent, pitch dark. As I listened to will you wait for me by Brett Young. My eyes couldn’t hold the tears back anymore, for that moment in time I allowed for them to flow.
I had been thinking all day, am I going insane? Where are all these feelings coming from? My mother along with many elders always said “when the right one comes along, you’ll know. It won’t be like the other relationships you’ve had. It’s not imagining the rest of your life together. You just know, trust your intuition.”
I need the truth, I needed to do it for me. I needed to protect myself before I got hurt. So I did it. I told him how he made me feel. As descriptive as I can “he made me feel happy, but apart of me was angry. Where has he been my whole life? Why did we take so long to cross paths? Does he know how many heart aches I went through? I wanted to squeeze him, I wanted to shout at him. Most importantly I wanted to cry, I wanted to cry in his arms. I wanted to feel his warm embrace. His entrance in my life, lifted that heavy stone I’ve been carrying all these years.
To my amuse, he responded the same. The only question he had was “is she real?” Since he’s older than me he should be the one to ask “where have you been all my life?”
He gets off work at 11:00pm, calls at 4:00am to wake me up for work. Worries for me, and falls asleep thinking if I’ll wake up hungry. His soul is so beautiful. Yet it frightens me . . .
Words can’t express how I feel about you. The day you came into my life was the day I knew I was blessed. You make me feel so secure and safe. When I’m with you, the passing of time no longer matters. The way you make me laugh, the way you make my heart skip a beat… thinking about these things not only puts a smile on my face but also on my heart. I look forward to the memories we’ll be creating together. The only thing that saddens me is that we didn’t meet sooner but I won’t dwell on that because I know all of the events that took place throughout the universe was to bring us together. If you had asked “where have I been your whole life?” I would’ve told you, “I was preparing to become the person you needed me to be.”